20 Things for Which I am Thankful

I apologize for not writing a post last week.  With having a presbytery meeting, a session meeting, and having to write my monthly column for our church newsletter, I just couldn't fit it into my schedule.  This week all I am going to do is offer you a list of things for which I am thankful.  This list is in no particular order and is made up of things that have popped into my mind throughout the day.

1.  I am thankful for my health and for the health of my family.  We cannot take it for granted that we will always be this healthy so we better appreciate it while we are.

2.  I am thankful I don't live in Ferguson, Missouri today.  If you have watched the news you know there are lots of reasons to be thankful for being somewhere else.

3.  I am thankful for my wife, Danielle.  Not everyone has a good marriage.  Danielle and I have a great marriage.  

4.  I am thankful that my eight-year-old son, Wyatt, made a basket in his basketball game last weekend.  I'm not one of those parents who lives vicariously through my kids and pushes them to succeed where I have failed (although I was terrible at basketball).  I'm thankful because when we're learning something new we all need "a win" at some point to give us the energy to keep growing and learning.  The smile on his face was priceless.

5.  I am thankful that my almost-five-year-old, Josselyn, loves to climb up in the chair with me every evening for "daddy snuggles."  That won't always be the case.  I better be thankful for it while I have it.

6.  I am thankful that I serve a congregation that doesn't just care about what I can provide for them but cares for me as a member of their family of faith.  I hear a lot of colleagues talk of constant tension between them and their congregations.  I'm fortunate not to have to deal with that.

7.  I am thankful that I wasn't born in the mid-1800's.  I love history and the more I learn about the Civil War the more thankful I am that I wasn't around back then.

8.  I am thankful that we live in a beautiful manse that is well taken care of by the church trustees.  When something breaks, it's not my problem.  I'm very thankful for that.

9.  I am thankful that our two dogs, Eli and Daisy, run excitedly to the door to meet me when I come in the house.  It's always nice to know that someone is glad you are home.

10.  I am thankful that the local CVS carries Clubman Mustache Wax.  For some strange reason I've been wanting to grow an Old West style handlebar mustache, but I had trouble finding the wax I need to make that happen.  Thanks CVS for making my dream a reality!

11.  I am thankful that Josselyn wanted to watch the movie Gremlins with me this past weekend and that she enjoyed it and didn't have any nightmares.

12.  I am thankful that Wyatt has inherited my love for history and biography.  The fact that I can have a conversation with my eight-year-old about World War II fills me with joy.

13.  I am thankful for the staff of our church.  They are all exceptional and do way more than anyone realizes.

14.  I am thankful that Netflix has picked up the fourth season of the show Longmire.  I love the books and I love the show.  I was so disappointed when A&E cancelled it out of the blue. Last season ended on a cliffhanger.  Now we'll know the answer!

15.  I am thankful for the people who are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to serve in the military.  Not only are they sometimes in harm's way but they spend so much time away from their families.  I know that because my dad was in the Navy for 20+ years and he had to be gone about six out of every twelve months.

16.  I am thankful that this year I have been able to see my dad, step-mom, stepsister and her husband and kids in South Carolina, my sister in Philadelphia, and my mom, step-dad, brother, sister and her husband and their daughter in San Antonio.  I didn't make it to California to see my other sister and her kids, but I'm very thankful for the number of folks I did get to see this year.

17.  I am thankful that I haven't had a kidney stone in three years.  I've had somewhere around seven kidney stones since I was 19-years-old.  If you've ever had one, you know why I'm glad that I've had a three year break.

18.  I am thankful for Danielle's homemade stuffing even though she made some the other day for her co-workers and I didn't get to eat any of it.  (update: she brought me the two-day old leftovers, which I ate)

19.  I am thankful that my student loans are finally paid off!  Freedom!

20.  I am thankful for the grace and mercy of God in Jesus Christ, for the life, teachings, death, and resurrection of our Lord, for mercy, forgiveness, strength, faith, hope, and peace. People who don't know this will never understand what they're missing.

I could go on forever and ever.  I have so much for which to be thankful.  Consider taking the time this week to write out twenty things for which you are thankful.  I bet you won't have a problem coming up with that many.  Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Grace and Peace,
Everett

Missed Shots

Last night Kobe Bryant set the NBA record for most missed shots in a career.  When asked about breaking the record he said, "I'm a shooting guard who has played 19 years... a shooting guard."  At first glance we might find it embarrassing.  The most misses?  But then we realize that being tops on that list means that Bryant has been good enough to play 19 years (and counting) in a league that has an average career length of 4.8 years and that he shoots the ball a lot (after all, he is a shooting guard).  The other thing is that when we look at the list we see that the others on the top of the list are all Hall of Fame legends of the game and that many of the names on the list for most misses are the same names on the list of most points scored in a career.  So does this record mean that Kobe Bryant is a bad shot?  Well, Kobe Bryant is fourth on the list of all-time NBA scoring leaders after Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Karl Malone, and Michael Jordan.  Unless Kobe gets hurt, he will pass Jordan this year.  You can't do that if you're a bad shot.

Similarly, Brett Favre was one of the top quarterbacks of all time.  You might not know, however, that he also holds the record for the most interceptions, fumbles, and incompletions. Do you know which major league pitcher holds the records for most batters walked?  Nolan Ryan.  He has also struck out the most batters.  How about the pitcher with the most losses in a career?  Cy Young.  Yet, the award for the best pitcher in each league every year is named after him!  Who has the most strikeouts as a batter?  Reggie Jackson.  Mr. October!  

Sports show us that those who fail the most are quite often those that succeed the most as well. What makes someone great is not that they never fail, but that they keep trying their hardest, keep learning lessons, keep improving, and keep on keepin' on.  They don't get discouraged; they take it as a challenge and grow from it.  This isn't just true in sports, however.  

Consider the example of Abraham Lincoln.  He lost in an election for the Illinois state legislature, failed in business, had a nervous breakdown, lost his bid to become speaker of the Illinois state legislature, lost a bid for congress, finally got elected but then couldn't get reelected, lost an election for senate, was on the losing ticket as the vice presidential candidate, lost an election for senate again, and then became arguably the most important president in the history of the United States.  Winston Churchill is also a great example.  He failed miserably during World War I costing thousands upon thousands of lives because of his terrible strategy for the Gallipoli campaign.  He was removed from office and shamed. He was enemy #1 in Great Britain.  Then he ended up being perhaps the most important leader in the modern history of the Western world.  In addition, Thomas Edison failed way more than he succeeded.  

If failure defines you then you are a failure.  If failure challenges you and propels you forward then you are a success. Here is how business guru Seth Godin puts it:

If I fail more than you do, I win, because built into this lesson is the notion that you get to keep playing.  If you get to keep playing, that means you get to keep failing.  Sooner or later you're going to succeed.  The people who lose are either the ones who don't fail at all and get stuck or the ones that fail so big that they don't get to play again... but [unlike airline pilots and people who build pacemakers] most of us live in the kind of world in which the kind of failure I'm talking about isn't fatal at all.

Why am I saying all of this?  Well, the story about Kobe Bryant's record got me thinking, as have two books I've read recently.  The first is Mindset by Carol Dweck and the second is The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday.  Reading those books helped me to realize that for years--since childhood--I have been doing what is easy and avoiding failure at all costs.  I only played the sports I was already good at, and I only took the classes in which I knew I'd get an A.  Because of that I didn't learn much and I didn't develop fortitude.  Part of why I left my first church was that we'd failed at building a new handicap accessible building (my idea) and I think I may have left because I couldn't bring myself to fail again.  By the way, after I left they figured out how to get it done, helped along by the fact that they didn't have to pay me anymore.  Part of why I started looking to leave my second church was that the core of my youth group--that had made youth ministry easy--was about to graduate.  Without them I'd be a failure.  So I ran. Thankfully God guided me to this wonderful congregation in Washington Court House, Ohio, but I have to admit that when we failed in our efforts to bring on a staff member in children's and youth ministry I had to fight off the feeling that I'd failed so bad that I needed to leave.  Somehow, though, God did a work in me earlier this year and the books I've read recently have helped me to understand just how important that work was for my future.

For years I'd avoided writing a novel because I just knew it wouldn't be good.  It wouldn't be published and nobody would buy it even if it was.  So I just didn't do it.  But this year I did it, and only 25 people bought the e-book version of it.  In years past that would have crushed me and I would have sworn off writing forever.  This year, however, I said, "Hey, I wrote a novel!"  I don't even think that the novel failed. Although I don't think any publishing house would pick it up because it is too short and not exotic enough for contemporary tastes, if I was to self-publish a printed book of it I think I could sell more of it.  I've researched ways to do that.  What if it fails?  Then I'll learn something.

I used to say, "I'm not a runner.  I wasn't built for running," but this year I said, "I can only become a runner by running."  Over and over I failed in being able to run as far as I wanted to run, but every single day I got in better shape.  I got to where I could run 3 miles, then 4 miles, then 5 miles, then six miles, then seven miles, and then eight miles.  The truth is that for years I was just making excuses and believing my own excuses.  I was afraid to fail.  What if I don't win?  I'll fell bad about myself. This year I just pushed through and you know what?  I lost more than thirty pounds, ran three regular 5K's, one obstacle zombie 5K, and a brutal 10K trail run.  Did I win any of them? Heck no!  There are high school kids who can run twice as fast and five times as far without breaking a sweat.  I did win a few medals for my age/gender group.  I had to be willing to fail in order to grow and achieve.

I want to close by saying that I think that we, not just in our personal lives but as a congregation, need to be willing to fail in the effort to fulfill our vision of "sharing the wonder and love of God with all."  Failing means that we're trying.  If we never fail that means that we aren't trying anything.  One area that I think we need to try some new things is in the structure of our church leadership.  As far as I know, we still have the same number of officers that we had when we were a church of twice--almost three times--the size.  

Our church bylaws--because they were written when this congregation was quite different--are quite constricting.  I remind all of us, however, that while the Scriptures say "the Word of the Lord shall stand forever," they don't say the same thing about church bylaws.  We can change them to better reflect our current vision, mission, and needs.  But we've always done it this way.  That's not true and even if it was it doesn't necessarily matter. But what if we change things and it is a disaster?  Well, then we'll learn something and we'll try to fix it.  Let's be willing to think way outside the box in all sorts of areas.  Jesus said that even the gates of hell can't prevail over His church, so I'm pretty sure our experimenting with different leadership structures and other ways of doing ministry aren't going to be what brings the whole thing down. We have to keep things in perspective.

I'm not the biggest fan of Kobe Bryant, but I have to give credit where credit is due.  Congratulations Kobe on having the record for most missed shots.  Your play on the court is an inspiration to me because I know that the only reason you're missing shots is because you're taking them, and you know what, we'll only remember the ones you made anyway.

Have a great week,

Pastor Everett

Freedom after Fifteen Years!

This past week Danielle and I achieved something momentous and life changing.  We made the final payment on my student loans, paying them off years early!  After fifteen years of never missing a payment, usually paying extra, and at least twice making large bulk payments to shrink the principle, we are done!  Educational debt is an absolute scourge on our society, especially for people in my generation and the folks who are younger than me.  It is only getting worse.  Proverbs 22:7 says, "The borrower is slave to the lender."  Well, this borrower is no longer slave to that particular lender.  

Having your debt paid gives great freedom.  So why am I writing about this on my pastor's blog?  Well, the reason is that I have the Church to thank for helping this to happen.  This month our congregation is hearing "Stories of Generosity." Here is just such a story.

When I went to college my family was not able to help me financially at all.  When I was applying to schools I knew that I had $0.  Thankfully I received some scholarships and grants, but I also worked part-time during school and full-time during the summers.  In addition to these forms of income, I also took out loans, eventually racking up about $20,000 in debt, which is a lot of money, but much less than a lot of people. When I graduated, I got a job paying $27,000 a year and started making payments six months after graduation.  Even though many people I know deferred their loans until they could make more money, I have made every single payment and more.  I borrowed the money, so it was my responsibility to pay it.

Three years after graduation, I felt called to go to seminary to study for pastoral ministry.  Before I even realized this call on my life, the people of First United Presbyterian Church of Guthrie, Oklahoma discerned this call.  Under the leadership of Rev. L. Dale DePue and then Rev. Karen Rogers, the congregation felt that if they discerned God's calling on my life that they needed to help make that happen because a Master of Divinity degree from a seminary is very, very expensive.  They took my seminary education on as a mission. The little congregation, which at the time had about 80 folks in worship each week, raised more than $15,000 to help fund my pastoral education.  

I think every church should do for their seminarians what FUPC in Guthrie did for me.  They truly understood their role in the larger family of the Presbyterian Church (USA).  In addition to the generosity of the saints of FUPC-Guthrie, I received a scholarship from the Synod of the Sun (a regional governing body of the PCUSA), as well as a large tuition waiver from the endowment of Austin Presbyterian Theological Seminary.  Because of the generosity of Presbyterian Christians in Guthrie, Oklahoma, the Synod of the Sun (Oklahoma, Texas, Louisiana, Arkansas), and those over the years who had given to APTS, as well as my part-time job in the admissions office, and Danielle's full-time work at the University of Texas, I did not have to take out any loans to fund my seminary education.  Some folks leave seminary with $50,000 or more in loans in addition to what they might have already accumulated in undergraduate school.  I, on the other hand, took on no additional debt and even made every loan payment while I was in seminary and we continued to give money every single month to the ministries of our home church back in Guthrie.  Because of the generosity of the Church, I finished seminary with less debt than when I started seminary.  That's not where the church's role in this ends, however.

I cannot imagine how long I would be paying on my educational debt if I would have had to take out loans for seminary.  I think it is ridiculous how much seminary costs.  It seems to me that as a Church we should find ways to educate our spiritual leaders if we really believe they are called by God to serve in that role.  I am very fortunate that my debt did not grow so I was able to make progress on paying it off.  This process of paying it off was also helped by a program through the Presbyterian Church (USA) that grants up to $2,500 a year (for up to four years) toward paying off student loan debt if a pastor serves a church with less than 100 members and a budget of less than $100,000.  My first church fit both of those criteria.  I only stayed there two years (a decision I regret sometimes) but that money helped to knock down the principle, which lessened the interest that compounded over the years.  Eventually I ended up coming to serve my current congregation, First Presbyterian Church of Washington Court House, Ohio.  This congregation is very generous to me and to my family, which has enabled us to pay extra on the loan every month until this month when we made our final payment.

As brothers and sisters in the family of Christ and as different parts of the same body of Christ we are to take care of each other.  "Share with the Lord's people who are in need," Paul writes in Romans 12:13. When we do this, "the service [we] perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord's people, but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God," Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 9:12.  We are in this together and if we truly value the church's ministries we will invest financially in those ministries.  The same goes for the ministries of our teaching elders (pastors).  If we truly value their training and ministry then we must invest in it by paying them well and helping them to pay off their educational loans that made it possible for them to serve our congregations.  

Seminary is very expensive--too expensive in my opinion--and too many seminary students and graduates are being left on their own to pay off that debt.  It is a shame that so many congregations see the call to pastoral ministry as being a call placed merely on an individual rather than a call placed on that individual and the church together.  I am so thankful that the generosity of not just hundreds, but thousands of saints has made it to where at the age of 36 I am completely free of educational debt.  By the way, Danielle is free of educational debt as well.  This will enable us to give more to the ministries of the Church and to assist those in need, to save for Wyatt and Josselyn's college so they won't have to take on debt, and to save for retirement.  "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free," Paul says in Galatians 5:1. Thanks to Christ's Church today I am experiencing even more freedom in Christ.  Thanks be to God!

With Gratitude,

Pastor Everett