I recognized (and mentioned) that "being born again" is not a phrase that many PC(USA)Presbyterians use or find comfortable. A lot of that has to do with the cultural-political use of that phrase, but I don't think that is totally it. I think there are other factors at work as well with many folks in the PC(USA)and other kinds of churches I'm sure. A lot of us don't like it when we are challenged to understand and embrace the fact that the overwhelming witness of the entire Bible, especially the teachings of our Lord Jesus, say that our faith and discipleship cannot be just one more thing we do. Our discipleship must be the defining force in our lives. In all four gospels, along with grace, mercy, and love, Jesus also teaches repentance, costly discipleship, and dying to self. This is tough for us to hear. We want Jesus to be our friend we can call up whenever we're available. But according to the Scriptures that is not the kind of relationship Jesus expects. He expects dedicated discipleship that dedicates all aspects of life to God.
After I preached, someone came to me experiencing some very real spiritual anxiety. After our conversation I thought about it more and emailed the following response to that person. I'm much better (and wiser) when I can think for a bit and then write it out. My sense is that this person is not the only one that left with a bit of anxiety. I'm not sorry for that, however. It is my firm belief that the gospel, when faithfully preached, will always comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. We all need to be challenged in order to grow. Think of our muscles. The only way to grow muscles is to rip them a little bit (but not too much). It is the same with our souls as well. If I did not preach challenging sermons, none of us would grow past an immature spiritual infancy. We would simply listen to sermons that merely confirm our own preexisting beliefs and biases without holding them up to the gospel. I want to share my response to that very sincere person. I have removed anything that would identify the person. I do this only because I think it could be helpful to others. If this is something you're experiencing, just pretend it is addressed to you.
Dear _________
I sense that you are experiencing some spiritual anxiety right now. Last week you said that you wanted to "really, really believe.” Today you wanted to know what would happen if you hadn’t been born again (or born from above) or regenerated before you die. I really want to put your mind and your spirit at ease.
First, we have to be careful not to merely equate what Jesus calls “the kingdom of God” with heaven after we die. The way that Jesus presents the kingdom of God (or kingdom of heaven as he calls it in Matthew) it is not merely heaven somewhere else and sometime later. The kingdom of God should be equated with life as it exists when God is in charge and things are done God’s way. This exists perfectly in heaven but through Jesus it has broken into our world. So when Jesus says we must be born again to see the kingdom of God, Jesus isn’t necessarily saying, “You must be born again to go to heaven,” although that is a part of the bigger picture. In essence, Jesus is saying, “You must be born again to experience and participate in life as it exists when God is in charge and things are done God’s way. This is for now and for later.” What Jesus calls being “born again” has as much effect on our life now as it does after we die.
Second, we also have to be careful not to limit faith to believing things in our heads. Faith is really less about believing this and that (although that is important) and much more about trust. Trust keeps going after belief gives up. Sometimes I personally have trouble believing some of the things about Jesus. However, I have come to the point where even if I have trouble believing them now, I still trust God that they are so. Then I always come back around. So don’t work so hard trying to convince yourself to believe certain things. Instead continue to build a relationship with God through Scripture reading (Philippians is a great place to start), through spiritual reading (I can lend you a book), through corporate worship on Sundays, through spiritual conversations (like this one), and through prayer and silence. As you come to trust God more and more, believing won’t be a problem anymore.
Third, I really want you to know that I do not think you need to be anxious. You are seeking. You want to know God more. You want to grow in faith. This is the number one evidence that you have had a regenerative (born again) experience even if you didn’t have some dramatic conversion. If it hadn’t happened, you wouldn’t care about knowing God. As I said earlier, John Calvin felt that if you are worried about whether or not it has happened to you that is a great sign that it has. It is the Holy Spirit that draws us toward God. So if you are being drawn toward God (which I think you are), the Holy Spirit is working in you. It is the Spirit that is whispering to you at this time in your life, “Hey, _______, I love you. Get to know me better.”
The Scriptures promise us, “If… you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you seek him with all your heart and with all your soul” (Deuteronomy 4:29), “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13), “So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened” (Luke 11:9). You are asking, seeking, and knocking. That is good. All this is not so we will go to heaven when die (although we certainly have that hope as well). All this is so we will love God and loving God is how we see the kingdom of God here and now as well as there and later.
If you only remember one thing from this letter, remember this:
Wanting to love God is a form of loving God. Although you may not be where you wish you were in regard to your faith, the very fact that you know this shows that you are, in fact, on the right path. Calm your spirit. Be at peace. Just keep seeking God like you are now and I promise, you’ll continue to find God little by little.
Grace and Peace,
Everett
